Video Transcript
[0:00] Welcome to Caregiver SOS by Bay Alarm Medical. My name is Haley Burress. I’m a caregiving expert here to talk about the ugly side of caregiving that no one wants to talk about — the most frustrating and challenging parts of caring for an aging family member, and how to get through it.
[0:22] Have you ever thought that your brother or sister was always the favorite? Let’s see how that continues as adults with our next question: “My sister and I both care for my mom. We separate tasks and have a good system for supporting mom. I’m thankful for that. What I’m struggling with, though, is that my mom is always so angry with me when I help or suggest something. Meanwhile, my sister is the golden child and can’t do anything wrong. My mom is never angry with her and always follows her lead. It’s been this way since we’ve been kids.”
[0:50] Family rules and patterns only get stronger as we get older. It’s no wonder you’re feeling this strain, and it might be feeling a little too familiar to you from your childhood. Even though we become adults, those old favorite-child signs still show up, and it’s frustrating.
[1:03] Certainly, the best approach is to try not to take it personally. You’re there to help your mom with the tasks that you’re assigned. Brush off her comments the best that you can. Set boundaries by telling her you won’t let her talk to you like that. Leave if you’re especially upset, once you make sure she is safe.
[1:25] Of course, see a therapist. Practice regular self-care habits that remind you that you’re worthy and you’re someone’s favorite, too.
[1:33] If you’ve experienced this, share your story in the comments — we read every one.
[1:45] And don’t forget to like and subscribe for more caregiving advice.
