Video Transcript
[0:00] Welcome to Caregiver SOS by Bay Alarm Medical. My name is Haley Burress. I’m a caregiving expert here to talk about the ugly side of caregiving that no one talks about — the most frustrating and challenging parts of caring for an aging family member, and how to get through it.
[0:15] Let’s talk about how everyone appears to be judging caregivers. Here’s the question. “I’ve been helping out my mom for a while now and I don’t mind it. She doesn’t need tons of help, so that has been good for our relationship and for my mental health. But something I’ve noticed since becoming more of a caregiver is that everyone seems to have an opinion about caregivers. I feel more judged than supported by my family, friends, and neighbors.”
[0:52] I’m sorry this is happening. I hate that you feel more judged than supported by the people around you. Unfortunately, I believe this is a common experience among family caregivers.
[1:03] I think this judgment comes from a place of truly not understanding what it’s like to be a family caregiver. Unless you’ve done it, you might not realize how difficult it is to juggle a full-time job, parent teens or young adults, maintain a healthy marriage and friendships, exercise, drink enough water, keep up with everything society tells us we need to, and help out an aging parent.
[1:30] It’s easy to judge a family caregiver for giving processed meals to their senior loved one — without stopping to imagine what it actually takes to plan and prepare homemade meals that their loved one can safely reheat and enjoy.
[1:45] If you’re feeling judged, I suggest starting to attend a caregiver support group. You’ll find people just like you who are walking through similar things, and you’ll find real comfort in simply being seen and understood.
[2:00] You can also begin to get honest with your support team. If you feel judged by your friends, tell them so. Hopefully they will re-evaluate their actions and make meaningful changes. And if they don’t, perhaps they aren’t a good presence in your life right now.
[2:15] Like and subscribe for more caregiving advice.
